Curse of the Booty Shorts

I meant to post this a few months ago....

Declutter. It’s a word that is music to some peoples’ ears, to mine it’s a slur. It’s a word I would never dare to speak yet it screams in my ears every time I walk into my room. I have a bajillion things around. Do they have a place yes. I follow these women on Instagram, the one has her ADHD hoards, the other used to have ADHD hoards and now has a wheel of declutter. I look at the piles of things that used to have a place. My clothes that used to be neatly folded in a dresser now in a pile on the floor. I go through my clothes and start the familiar piles; keep, toss, fit check. Try on everything to see if it fits and if it fits, it goes in the unsorted pile. If it does not, it goes in the give to a friend pile. Not a hard task at all one would think. However, it becomes difficult when your favorite items no longer fit. It becomes this almost mourning practice. You attach every memory you have to that article of clothing as if your memory goes away with the item. I try to tell myself that I am not a sentimental person, yet I keep my clothes that do not fit in hopes of the maybes and the what ifs. Maybe I will fix it with the mending videos I have seen. Maybe it will fit later after summer. This time I will get motivated to clean. At this point, I have abandoned the task of decluttering, and the piles lay on my floor soon to be sprawled out like an urban neighborhood. At some point I get so deep that I lose the motivation to complete the task and as most will know, happiness only comes from tasks that are complete. Declutter was the intent, a mess was won and as a result my sanity has been reduced to almost smithereens. I sit and stare at everything and wonder if it is all even necessary and mentally propose the nuclear option. Get rid of everything start over, get new styles, new colors, new patterns, and maybe new shoes. Which leads me to a sale I got. Mystery shorts from this company I kind of liked at the time. I got 5 pairs which included 3 booty shorts. I have a small waist and a big booty. These shorts I keep trying to wear because I see all these other fit girlies wearing them and they just hug their booty perfectly. These shorts probably do the same I am just not used to it. So I continue to have these shorts in my pile because one day I might like them. One day I might wear them and not be self-conscious that my booty is hanging out, however, they take up clutter. And when things take up physical clutter, they take up mental clutter as well. So, with all of these piles and all of the lost motivation I had; It stares at me in piles of disorganization like the majority of my life. I finally caved, it was around 9 at night, I called my bestie and I was just trying on everything in my closet. Some things she liked, and I keep on a pile for her, everything else went into the hallway. My roommate came home and she looked in the hallway and then in my room, I am on the phone, and I am in the middle of trying clothes on. My room is an explosion of clothes. At the end of that session, I was exhausted because a lot of the clothes that I loved didn’t fit. I must tell myself that its okay and maybe someone will find it and love it just as I did. I still struggle; my friend reminds me of my rule. The next wave is going through everything and seeing if it fits the look I want to explore. Thrift stores are wonderful for this reason, or a tjmaxx, marshalls, or one of those other stores. Rummage sales are also good. In all of this, I am allowed to do it my way, because it makes sense to me. Yes I did make sure those booty shorts were in the bottom of that bag.