Memoires of Words

Do you have to be memorable to write a memoir? Well known or extraordinary to be able to have a memoir? I think of this often with the impact I want to make on the world. Is making a difference in a small forgotten town enough? Am I even considered extraordinary? Everyone has a story to tell, is my self-discovery journey worth telling to anyone who will listen? What will I be known for, smiling? Falling asleep easily? Being the person with a story for everything and ideas scattered and lodged within the folds of my brain. The woman who saved marriages in bars. The woman that everyone knows, sort of. I mean, they know what I look like in their respective areas. My bar scene sees all versions of me. The punk scene doesn’t see the sophisticated side of me. The modeling side doesn’t see either of the afore mentioned side. The coffeeshop scene sees my casual side. Does just being everywhere constitute a memoir? Have I made any type of difference in anyone’s life or enough people’s life? I changed the way office max did business before they got bought out by Office Depot. Who am I though? What do I enjoy? Have I broken enough hearts, gone through enough trauma, what makes a memoir a memoir? I think the answer to these questions, all of them, is yes. Because everyone remembers me from maybe a deep conversation, I had with them on the bus or the plane, the coffeeshop, the aisle in the grocery store. In someone’s story somewhere I am the rando lady that left some wisdom that stuck with them. I guess in my own life, these are the stories of the random people in my life that have challenged my thoughts. There are two things that people say that captivated them about me. My eyes and my smile. I have a laugh that can be heard in photos, a smile that is warm and inviting, and eyes that hold the stars in the sky the water in the oceans all the plants that grow. I am told I paint pictures with words that make one feel any emotion. I have a walk that owns the ground beneath my feet and that I float on the ground with grace. I have a voice that commands the attention of those around when I speak. I have read poetry and silenced bars during sports games. Like anything, write the memoir even if no one reads it. Do the thing even if no one sees and no one knows. Do something because you want to do it. I tell myself this all the time. I do the thing, almost self begrudgingly. But in the end, you look at it and you get to say look what I did. That moment I think is everything. Do not wait for something memorable to happen, be memorable.